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However, it is important to teach children to always submit to or challenge authority with grace and respect. Clearly the words we choose affect those they are directed towards.
Unkind words cause deep wounds in people; however, they can also lead our general attitude or our feelings about someone.
If the behavior is allowed or reinforced, it will continue.
It is best to stop it immediately when it happens, remain calm, listen to the child, and enforce consistent nonphysical consequences.
Start by teaching them to make their bed and clean up their toys daily.
I once made a decision to go an entire year saying only positive things about someone I had a hard time getting along with.