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“I went from being someone who thought of finding someone as this monumental challenge, to being much more relaxed and confident about it.Rachel was young and beautiful, and I’d found her after signing up on a couple dating sites and dating just a few people.” Having met Rachel so easily online, he felt confident that, if he became single again, he could always meet someone else.on the East Coast and spending a few years bouncing around, Jacob moved back to his native Oregon, settling in Portland.Almost immediately, he was surprised by the difficulty he had meeting women.It didn’t seem like there was going to be much of a mourning period, where you stare at your wall thinking you’re destined to be alone and all that.I was eager to see what else was out there.”of online dating are clear: the Internet makes it easier for single people to meet other single people with whom they might be compatible, raising the bar for what they consider a good relationship.But most of the online-dating-company executives I interviewed while writing my new book, Love in the Time of Algorithms, agreed with what research appears to suggest: the rise of online dating will mean an overall decrease in commitment.
He was passive in their arguments, hoping to avoid confrontation.
After two years, when Rachel informed Jacob that she was moving out, he logged on to the same day. Messages had even come in from people who couldn’t tell he was no longer active.
The site had improved in the two years he’d been away. And the population of online daters in Portland seemed to have tripled.
Before long, his new relationship fell into that familiar pattern.
“I’ve never been able to make a girl feel like she was the most important thing in my life,” he says.
He’d never imagined that so many single people were out there.