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One woman sends me a message heavily laden with sexual innuendo and I come to regard her as the mistress of the single entendre. Another woman's first contact with me included a plan for a day out together, including visits to art galleries, a stroll round a park and then "a few hours under the duvet". I'm later propositioned by someone who tells me she has an hourglass figure.
Her photograph reveals that the hour has stretched to 90 minutes.
Reading it on my laptop in the aptly named Cafe Affaire in central London, I consider what she really wants: a no-strings-attached sexual relationship.
What I don't know is how her husband will feel about it. Aside from the little matter of her marital status, she also believes I have a wife, but she doesn't care.
For your personal safety, do not ask for or give out your last name, address, phone number, email address, passwords or any of your Facebook, Skype, Yahoo, etc information to any person in this chat room.
After a quick search, I get the measure of the women on the site.I'm already starting to feel like I've had enough of this experiment.